Reuniting With Your Military Family: Making Summer Gatherings Comfortable, Supportive, and Memorable
One of the greatest gifts of military life is the lifelong bonds formed during service—families who PCS’d together, deployed side-by-side, or raised kids in the same base housing community. These friendships endure long after uniforms are folded away.
And summer? It’s reunion season.
Whether you’re planning a BBQ, road trip, or weekend getaway with former military friends, reconnecting can be joyful—but also a little nerve-wracking. Life has changed. Families have grown. Careers have shifted. And while the foundation is still there, the dynamics may be different.
Here’s how to make those reunions meaningful—not awkward—and ways to support each other through the ever-evolving journey from military to civilian life.
1. Acknowledge That Change Is Normal
Start with the understanding that everyone has changed—because they have. Children are older, career paths may have shifted, and people may look at the world through a post-military lens now. Expect some differences in lifestyle, pace, and even personality. That’s not a loss—it’s growth.
Tip: Open the weekend or evening with a short toast or moment of gratitude. Acknowledge the shared past and the present moment together. It sets a warm, inclusive tone right away.
2. Plan Group Activities with Flexibility
Avoid the awkward “so… what do we do now?” moments by planning ahead—but don’t over-plan. Choose low-pressure activities that allow for natural conversation and reconnection, like:
A backyard BBQ or potluck where everyone contributes
A family-friendly hike or beach day
A photo-sharing table with old pictures and updated snapshots
Tip: Include unstructured downtime so people can reconnect in smaller groups. Not everyone needs to be “on” the whole time.
3. Make Room for Storytelling
Military friendships are rooted in shared experiences. Let those stories come up naturally—but be mindful. Some may want to talk about deployments or transitions, while others may steer clear of the past altogether.
Suggestion: Set out a “memory jar” where people can drop written memories or fun anecdotes. It can be a light-hearted way to spark stories and laughter.
4. Support Without Pressure
It’s tempting to compare transitions—jobs, income, kids, success—but that can create silent tension. Instead, support one another by:
Asking open-ended questions about current goals and interests
Offering encouragement for recent transitions (new job, new city, retirement)
Respecting the challenges others might not talk about openly
Tip: Listen more than you talk. Sometimes the best support is just being present and affirming.
5. Honor the “New Normals”
Some families may now be single-parent households, others may be navigating post-service disabilities or mental health issues, and others might be thriving in totally unexpected ways. All of it is valid. Reunions should be safe spaces to show up as you are—not as people remember you.
Idea: If children or spouses have changed significantly since your last meet-up, consider creating short “family updates” or fun intros to break the ice and reduce awkwardness.
6. Keep the Bond Alive
Don't let the reunion be the end. Create a group text, private social media group, or shared digital calendar to plan future check-ins. One weekend can re-spark a lifelong connection—but only if you nurture it.
Final Thoughts
Military friendships are forged in unique fire. They withstand time, distance, and transition. As life moves forward, summer reunions offer a powerful chance to celebrate how far you’ve all come—and to remind each other that no matter where you go, you’re still family.
At Empowering Transitions Life Coaching, we believe that connection is a key pillar of successful reintegration. These reunions aren’t just for fun—they’re a vital part of emotional wellness, support, and continued growth.
Make the moment count. Make it meaningful. And make it yours.